Remembering a sweet friend, Brent Graber...

So, it's been since November that I've had the time to post here. I had a busy few months there with my business, but thankfully, Ryan picked up the slack where I left off. We do need to get some better pictures back on here, though, so I will come to the rescue once I have some editing time. I'll have to do that later, as I am dedicating this post to someone special to my heart. On February 16, the world lost a bright light. My friend from high school, Brent Graber, went to heaven on that day. He had been struck by a car from behind while riding his bike on January 18 in Boulder, and never recovered from the brain injuries sustained in that accident. I had lost touch with Brent in the exciting years after Ryan and I got married, but that is not a reflection on my feelings about him. He and I met the summer after my senior year of high school when we both worked in the Delphi Automotive summer intern program. He and his best friend, Brian, immediately befriended my friend Kristen and me. That whole summer, we were like the four musketeers, going to lunch several times a week, hanging out in the evenings, and even skipping out on work ("taking breaks") to be around each other. Brent and I had an instant bond, mainly because of his personality - he was just one of the most happy-go-lucky people I had ever met, and could find a reason to laugh in just about any situation. I appreciated this quality and knew that he was someone I would hold dear, no matter what happened. I went off to DePauw, and he finished high school (he was a year behind me), but I remember going back to his high school homecoming with Kristen because he and Brian were both on the homecoming court. We stayed in touch, and he ended up going just up the road to Wabash for college. We saw each other a few times in those years, and I remember him always talking about how someday, he was going to move to Colorado. I had a similar love for Colorado, and said maybe I'd get there, too. We obviously lost touch somewhere in there, probably because Ryan finally decided he was interested in me. A couple of years ago, while back in Kokomo for my Grandmother's funeral, I learned from Kristen's mom (I had lost touch with Kristen, too) that Brian had passed away suddenly a few months before. I was shocked and upset, and called Kristen. We talked about our times with Brent and Brian, and she told me that Brent had moved to Boulder to get his MBA at CU. I was so happy for him that he had finally achieved his dream. I told her I would contact him and have him over for dinner. I figured Ryan would really like him since they both loved sports and they could be friends, too. Unfortunately, being a new mom and having a lot going on trying to get my business going, I (very regrettably) never invited him over for dinner. On January 19, my mom and dad had just come into town for Wyatt's first birthday, and my mom shouted up to me that she had received a prayer request in an email for Brent Graber, that he had been in an accident. I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach. How could this have happened, especially so soon after Brian's death? We learned that Brent was in the ICU at Boulder Community Hospital, and I went twice to visit with his parents and brother - once with my mom to pray, and another time to take them food. Though I really hadn't known them, they were so kind and thoughtful, even though they were going through the hardest experience of their lives. I told them that Brent was one of my favorite people ever. While Brent was hospitalized, I prayed so hard for his recovery - this world needs more people like him, Christians with such a happy attitude. There is a caringbridge.org site with a journal and guestbook online where friends and family could read of Brent's progress and sign the guestbook. As I read the entries there, I saw how many lives Brent had touched, and how many wonderful things people had to say about him. The other day, I learned that Brent had passed away, and I was flooded with emotions. I couldn't believe that such a bright light could be put out at such a young age. I was angry with God, and angry at myself for not seizing the opportunity to contact him when I could have. Now I would not ever be able to tell him how much fun I had with him, what an honor it was to call him a friend. I went to Brent's memorial service Thursday evening, which was such a healing experience. As I sat there weeping, we watched a slide show of pictures from his life and heard his best friend from college and the years since describe the Brent I knew - a Tigger personality, always laughing, so positive. The pastor also gave an amazing message, talking about how Brent has just changed locations; he is not really gone. He talked about how Brent had gotten into backcountry skiing, climbing, and mountain biking. He worked for a company that makes avalanche rescue gear, and loved it. Brent had traveled the world and had amazing experiences. He lived with his brother, loved his family, and yes, even LIKED his family - wanted to be with them. :) I realized that he had lived such a great life, and had spread his happiness to all he encountered. Yes, with Brent's passing, the world has suffered an immeasurable loss; but it is a far better place because he lived. During the service, his friend read a letter from Brent's uncle, which also described the happy attitude of his nephew. He said that in response to Brent's passing, he is going to take that infectious smile that Brent gave over and over and give it to someone every day for the rest of his life - that is one way that he can keep Brent alive. I want to do that, too. Yes, I am still sad, still confused as to how this could happen, but there is so much to celebrate every day. Brent would want us all to be sharing his smile with others...so that is what I will do. God's purpose in this whole ordeal has not yet been revealed, and I have to admit, so often when I think about it, I am baffled. Why? But I trust that God is good, He loves us, and therefore this must be for the best. Godspeed, my sweet friend, until we meet again.